ARTICLE
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Sept/Oct 2009 |
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Word Fasting: The Spiritual Diet
by Jon Mundy
The body can act wrongly only when it is responding to misthought. Chapter 2, IV. 2:1-5
Would you know how many times you merely thought you were right, without ever realizing you were wrong? Manual for Teachers 10, 4:4
The following are practical suggestions, a means of observing our thoughts and correcting them by becoming progressively aware of language; and thus, the misthought which produces the language. Everyone likes to be right and the ego is more concerned with “control” than it is with “sanity.” The ego, however, keeps this motivation from our awareness. We think our judgments make us right. They are, however, “just” judgments. As François-René de Chateaubriand (1768-1848, France), the founder of romanticism in French literature said, “You are not superior just because you see the world in an odious light.” As each thought arises, observe; to who does this thought occur? When Ramana Maharshi (1879-1950, India), one of the most respected of the Indian Gurus, was asked a question, he often responded, “Who wants to know?” The first question is, who is the questioner and why do we want to know or assert anything? The Course asks us to learn to question the value of the ego as a guide in our life.
This “technique,” if employed, can enable a growing awareness of the level of insanity we have adopted. Through this process, we can see what it is that “pushes our buttons.” We can’t change our minds unless we are aware of the need to change. In our “dreaming of the world,” we are not aware that we are dreaming anymore than a dreamer is aware that he is making up a dream when he is asleep at night.
Purification is Necessary First
Miracles are everyone’s right, but purification is necessary first.
We sometimes try to correct others by telling them off and making them feel guilty, thinking this will make them change. This is often the problem children find in relationship to their parents. This process, rather than providing a cure, creates a sense of separation between us and others and it increases our sense of guilt. Our job is to focus on clearing up our own “mistakes,” not those of others. As we do, we begin to affect the other in a very subtle, non-verbal way. Actions speak louder than words.
What do we do when we go on a diet? We cut out certain foods, or we cut back on the amount of food or both. To go on a monetary diet, we cut back on spending. Problems arise when we overdo, when we overspend, overeat, drink too much, or “overplay” the severity of a situation. The solution is to cut back, to cut out; to drop projective thinking — to say nothing. One simple way to see how projective we are, is to watch the words that come out of our mouth. We can, thus, “let go” of the kind of thinking which keeps us from the truth. We cannot, however, change our thinking if we do not know that it is misguided.
Sometimes a sin can be repeated over and over, with obviously distressing results, but without the loss of its appeal. And suddenly, you change its status from a sin to a mistake. Now you will not repeat it; you will merely stop and let it go, unless the guilt remains. Chapter 19, III. 3:2-3
We must set aside the old in order for the new to come to the fore. The snake sheds its skin so that a new skin can emerge from below. Our bodies constantly dispel old cells to make way for new ones. In a similar way, having built up a number of defenses against the truth, we should not be surprised to find that, as we become progressively miracle-minded, there is a setting aside of old habits and thoughts which no longer serves us. Alcohol is known to make certain folks obstinate, headstrong, and argumentative. Former alcoholics and drug addicts say that even within a few days after the addictive behavior ceases, they begin to experience increasing clarity of thought. They even find themselves “wanting” to be nice to others. By being quiet, we become aware of the blocks we have placed between ourselves and others. However, we need willingness to look at our own darkness.
The more you approach the center of His thought system, the clearer the light becomes. ACIM, Chapter 11, Introduction. 3:4
Just as “disease” is a sign that something is wrong with the body, so is our distemper (the upsetting of a natural balance), a sign of a certain “pollution” or “disease” of the mind. We need, therefore, a mind-cleaning. If we do not wash out the stone and the sand, how can we find the gold? Just as stopping smoking or drinking or drugs means we’ve begun to purify our body, so dropping certain words from our language can be a valuable guide in helping us to clarify our thinking.
I have often repented of having spoken.
I
have never repented of not having spoken.
Every Word is a Projection Every word is a statement, a declaration, an announcement, a proclamation, an assertion coming out of the void—made in the world. The first cry of a baby coming out of the womb is a projection – a statement. The baby was so very warm and well-nourished in the womb and now suddenly there are bright lights and sounds, and someone grabbing a hold of it. With words, we label, concretize, solidify, and make real. One of the first words a child learns from the parent is, “no!” What is the first job given to Adam? He has to name things (Genesis 2:20). He begins by naming the animals. What is the first thing we learn in pre-school? We learn “words.” What is the first thing we do in a high school biology class? We begin by labeling the names of the parts of a flower or a frog.
This universe, superimposed upon
Brahman, is nothing but a name.
Naming creates duality. It distinguishes the things that are named from the things that are unnamed. All such distinctions are imaginary. Miracle-mindedness hears only one voice — “the inner voice of reason.” The inner voice of reason is, however, drowned out by the ego’s voice of outrage. The words that come out of our mouths are obvious expressions of our inner thoughts and personalities. According to “You Are What You Say,” by Jan Donges, in the July/August 2009 issue of Scientific American Mind Magazine, a wealth of psychological insights can be gained by looking at the words that come out of our mouth -- even the use of “little” words like pronouns and the frequency with which we use the word “I.”
Word Fasting
God offers only mercy. Your words should reflect only mercy, because that is what you have received and that is what you should give. ACIM, Chapter 3, VI. 6:1
Jesus, in the Gospels, says it is not what we put in our mouths that defile us; it’s what comes out of our mouths that defiles us. (Mark 7:15) A “word fast” is one way to catch the tricky ego at play. We may then avoid falling into its clutches. Looking at the words which come out of our mouths is a good way to begin to become aware of the extent of our own shadows.
1. Watch for Profanity. While watching a “reality” television show specifically designed for teenagers, with Sarah, my then teenage daughter, we soon noticed that the language of the participants had to be frequently “bleeped.” To damn a thing to hell is obviously a projection. One day in the cafeteria at the college where I used to teach, I could not help but overhear the conversations between a group of students at the table next to mine. One boy, in particular, had but one “f---ing” adjective for everything.
2. Watch for Name Calling. Notice the use of the words stupid, insane, ludicrous, ridiculous, idiotic, and absurd. These words are all highly projective and condemnatory. We would not want these words used in reference to ourselves, why would we want to use them in reference to another who (though perhaps wearing a disguise) is still one of our brothers?
Would you condemn your brothers or free them? Chapter 11, 6:2:2
3. Watch for “Dis” Words. During the years when I taught in Sing Sing prison (1982–1990), I noticed that one of the worst things a prisoner could have happen to him was to have another prisoner or guard “Dis” him — to disrespect him. “Hey, he dissed me man.” Everybody needs respect. “Dis” comes from the Latin meaning “to render apart” or “asunder.” We can only be disappointed if we have an appointment; an expectation or anticipation about the way a situation is supposed to look. If it doesn’t look that way – we get to be disappointed. A friend once gave me a little plaque with the innocent face of a cocker spaniel puppy on it and under the picture was the caption.
Blessed are those who expect nothing for they will not be disappointed.
Only an ego can be disappointed. To tell a child that we are disappointed in them is to place a heavy burden on them. To be dis-graceful we must first have been filled with grace. To be dis-eased we must first have been at ease. We can only be dis-illusioned if we are living with an illusion. We can only be dis-enchanted if we are first enchanted.
4. Watch for Disgusted, Irked, and Vulgar We’ve been judging all our lives and we don’t just stop judgment. Just watching happens without saying anything. Not judging does not mean—not making simple judgments. “Am I having eggs or oatmeal for breakfast” or “What am I going to wear?” What we’re wearing doesn’t make a difference unless we’re into power dressing or sexy dressing, in which case, we are trying to manipulate the universe. Dress to be comfortable. Our concern is with judgments which involve condemnation, criticism, and blame. We learn to observe without comment to another or to ourselves. Try fasting from judging. See it and stop it. See it and stop it. Just let it go. Just walk away. Think more than twice before speaking. Look at the world without adding anything to it.
Watch your mind for the temptations of the ego, and do not be deceived by it. It offers you nothing. ACIM, Chapter 4. IV, 6:1-2
We’re looking out essentially for heavily judgmental words. Consider the word dis-gusted. It is a highly judgmental word. Who are we to be “disgusted?” On another occasion, a friend kept saying, “It irks the hell out of me.” Disgusted, irked, and vulgar represent something which comes up from the gut and makes us sick. The choice to condemn takes our peace of mind away from us. Did you ever say of someone that they are rude or uncouth? Are things appalling, horrendous, inexcusable, or atrocious? Is it really, or is our judgment about a thing keeping us from seeing? If we “take” offense, we “give” offense.
5. Watch for Despicable. Despicable comes from the Latin “de” meaning “down” and specere "to look on," as in “denigrate.” According to his biography, Alexander Hamilton, by Ron Chernow, Alexander Hamilton, the first Secretary of the Treasury of the United States, and the then vice-president of the United States Aaron Burr, were longtime, political rivals who occasionally said “inappropriate” things about each other. In 1804, Hamilton's father-in-law was quoted in the Albany Register saying that Hamilton had a despicable opinion of Aaron Burr. Burr demanded an apology and when it was not forthcoming, Burr challenged Hamilton to a duel. They dueled in Wehawken, New Jersey, and Aaron Burr killed Alexander Hamilton over the word despicable. I once heard an American historian say that he thought that out of all the founding fathers, the one with the highest IQ was Alexander Hamilton. He devised the banking system that we use to this day. He had sixty people working in his department when others had only five. He may have had the highest IQ, but it seems a low EQ (Emotional Quotient).
6. Watch for Upset or Offended. Upset and offended are indications of the loss of balance. Only an ego can be upset. To be upset, we must first have a set-up. We set it up, so we could be upset. The English word upset comes from the German aufsetzen meaning to overturn or capsize as we might lose our balance in a canoe. One translation for upset in Spanish is trastornado meaning to have a tornado, or twister. Like a cartoon character walking around with a thunderstorm over the top of its head. If we live in a place of inner balance, we cannot be upset. In a similar way, if we are off-ended, something pushes us “off the end.” Only an ego can be offended.
7. Watch for Being Outraged or Insulted. Out-rage comes from the Anglo-French ut-rage, or outer or uter—like other. It’s the other that’s the problem. Out-rage means we are “raging out.” We sometimes hear on the evening news that the family is “outraged” or the community is “outraged.” To be out-raged, we must feel that either we or others have been injured or insulted. In-sult comes from the Latin insultar, meaning to leap upon or assail. Could Jesus be insulted? If we think we have been wronged or insulted, it’s a good time to stop, look, and listen. No one can insult us, unless we think they can. Could any enlightened being be insulted? Could God be insulted? Does what I see make me outraged? Is there ever a time when we could be justifiably outraged? No, Nunca, Never! Anyone can say all manner of evil against us and it will have no effect on us, if we know who we are in truth.
Teach no one he has hurt you, for if you do, you teach yourself that what is not of God has power over you. Chapter 14. III. 8:2
8. Watch for Bugged. Sometimes just a little word shows how our peace of mind can be taken from us. I was talking with an amazing man, a physics professor who loved to play with ideas. It was wonderful to see the way his mind worked. He would get so excited by the ideas he was playing with. He must have been a delight for his students. One of the phrases my friend used was, “What bugs me is.” He had a bug as one might have a cold, infection, or a virus. Why would anything bug us? The miracle-minded literally cannot be “bugged.”
9. Watch for Hate and Afraid. Do we really hate some of the things we say we hate? Notice the use of the phrase, “I hate that” or “I hate it when that happens.” One of my daughter’s friends was talking about the way she hated her hair and how she hated the way she was dressed. Are we really afraid it might rain this afternoon? Is hate, fear, and afraid really the words we want to be using?
Words to Cut Back but Not Completely Eliminate Most of the above words, we can completely cut from our vocabulary. Just as we might completely cut candy, cake, and ice cream from our diet and not miss them; it will be better for us if they are not there. The next group of words we’ll probably have to use from time to time, though we can cut back on the frequency and be more conscious of the “context” in which they are used. The thing to notice is whether or not the words are used in a heavy, ego-laden and judgmental way. They may be words we need to use, but we don’t have to use them so much. We’re not completely cutting out these words. Here, we’re just going on a more restricted diet, not a complete fast.
10. Watch for They. One morning, I drove a friend to the airport. He wanted to listen to a particular radio station which gave regular reports on traffic conditions. There was a political commentator making observations about the state of our world along with the constant repetition of the word, “They, they, they, they.” Who are they? The truth is, there is no they.
11. Watch for Want, Need, and Have to Have. There are times, of course, when we may need to go to the grocery store or to stop for gas. Do we, however, really need or have to have some of the things we may think we need? Byron Katie has a book called, I Need Your Love. Is That True? The development of miracle-mindedness leads progressively away from needing, wanting, or having to have anything.
12. Watch for But.
"You said 'but.' I've put my finger on the whole trouble. You're a 'but' man. Don't say, 'but.' That little word 'but 'is the difference between success and failure. Sgt. Ernie Bilko in The Phil Silvers Show (from the 1950’s)
"But" becomes negative when we use it to reverse whatever we say. When we make a positive statement then follow it with the word "but," we undo what we said before it. “I love you, but...” “You are very organized, but...” This will probably not be perceived as a compliment. We can always tell in a sentence when a “but” is coming up before it is said. Instead of the word “but,” put a period in its place and start a new sentence. Sometimes we will need to say but. In fact, according to the study by Jan Donges, mentioned at the beginning, “but” can also be used when we are “trying to be honest,” that is, when we are trying not to overlook the details of a description; or, we are trying to look at both sides of a situation. What we’re looking for is the use of but in a critical statement.
13. Watch Phrases Suggesting Over-Extension Many of these words relate directly to diet. For example, “I’m stuffed, or “I’m too full,” “I overdid it,” or, “I can’t help myself.” are all demonstrations of the lack of our own control and represent our being out of balance. Sometimes when folks do something inhumane they excuse themselves by saying they are only human.
14. Watch Phrases Suggestive of Bodily Response. “He makes me sick.” “I can’t stand it.” “He is a pain in the butt.”
15. Watch for Weasel Words.
I have made every effort to use words that are almost impossible to distort, but it is always possible to twist symbols around if you wish. ACIM, Chapter 3. I. 3:11
Weasel words are a little more difficult to distinguish. They are “twists” on words and/or words with double meanings. Weasel words are used to trick people; and thus, avoid a straight-forward answer. They conceal the truth and are used to manipulate. We say the company is restructuring rather than saying people are being fired. The Pentagon speaks about collateral damage rather than killing people. Soldiers are taught to speak of those they are killing, not as people; rather, they are to be called the enemy. Weasel words include generalizations like, “Many people say...,” “I heard that..., and “The alleged thief...” Even the use of the word alleged implies that one is a thief.
I Have Learned a Great Secret
I have learned a great secret. I am going to tell you
You can’t push someone’s buttons if they don’t have any buttons to be pushed. Not only are we not to judge, we don’t have to be upset if others judge us. This is a real sign of spiritual maturity. Jesus, going to the cross because of others’ judgments of him, is an extreme example. He was willing to be crucified to show us that it didn’t mean anything. Sometimes, we’re tested big time. Expect nothing of others and if love comes back our way, we can enjoy it. Keep giving love away, even if it goes unacknowledged.
Mo Chao – Devise No Words. Bodhidharma, (early fifth century, B.C.E., China) the founder of Zen Buddhism, says, “Devise no words.” In China, they call this state of mind mo chao — when we are not projecting. Mo means “serene or silent” and chao means “awareness.” It is a mirror-like quality that just reflects, just sees, just receives -- just loves. Jesus in the gospels says, we should let all of our answers be “Yes,” or “No”— all else comes from evil. Watch carefully and see what is being said. In so far as we “live” within the ego-mind, we remain not entirely conscious of why we do what we do. It is possible to awaken from this darkness. A good place to start is to watch the words that come out of our mouths.
Be careful of your thoughts,
Your words should reflect only mercy, because that is what you have received and that is what you should give. ACIM Chapter 3. III. 6:2
Better to trip with the feet than with the tongue. Peace, |
